Atari Hits New Low with Cryptocurrency and Online Gambling
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 04/12/20 at 03:03 PM CT
I don’t think it’s necessary to retread the well-trampled ground of Atari’s (delenda est) past crimes, since I covered that dark chapter in videogame history quite well enough back in 2012. Yet, just when it seemed that the worst platform-holder in all of gaming history was ready to turn over a new leaf with their rebooted Atari VCS ‘open’ tinker-friendly console (which still hasn’t shipped nearly a year after going up for pre-order), two new Atari (delenda est) projects have come to light for 2020, and they are wholly indicative that the vile subsidiary still hasn’t learned its lesson.
First off, Atari (delenda est) has created a new cryptocurrency to compete with Bitcoin and its myriad ilk, which seems to be tied intimately into the Atari VCS’s online ecosystem. These so-called “Atari Tokens” are meant to be a new take on the old token-based economies of “totally legitimate businesses” like carnivals, county fairs, and traditional arcades where players of …
‘Animal Crossing’ is Not a Tentpole Franchise
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 04/05/20 at 05:02 PM CT
Those depraved Nintendo fanboys are at it again! With the dismal release schedules happening in the world of videogames for the past two months, combined with the delays and postponements triggered by the coronavirus plague, hype-driven, FOMO-inspired gamers are desperate for some new thing to obsess over. And as Nintendo platforms are prone to what their own fan communities euphemistically refer to as “droughts,” anyone who only owns a Switch at this point is being forced to look closely at the platform’s giant pile of ports – and old news doesn’t inspire FOMO – or desperately cling to the single new first-party release and inflate its importance beyond sanity. Most of them chose the latter. And what is that release? “Animal Crossing: New Horizons.”
First, let’s start with a short history lesson about ‘Animal Crossing.’ The series was a new first-party Nintendo IP that initially launched on the Gamecube, alongside the likes of ‘Pikmin.’ However, before …
Backlog: The Embiggening – April, 2020
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 03/29/20 at 06:01 PM CT
Welcome back to another look into the near future. Thanks to the disgusting eating habits of our brothers and sisters in China, the world is on lockdown as we attempt to ride-out the spread of the COVID-19 plague. For gamers, staying inside and never glimpsing the light of day is standard operating procedure, but the effect the coronavirus is having on the companies that develop and publish the games we dedicate our lives to is far more dire, with numerous pending delays. But modern games are a commodity that can be purchased digitally, thus removing the requirement of contact with a store clerk or other shoppers, and as more and more people are forced to adopt the gamer lifestyle, the demand will only increase.
How unfortunate, then, that the only thing worse than the continuing community spread of COVID-19 in April is the slated schedule of videogame releases.
It’s a new month, and of course, there will be shovelware. The quantity of it is rather light, though… but …
Vaguely Related Review: Channel Master Stream+
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 03/22/20 at 05:38 PM CT
Android-powered microconsoles have been a thing for 7 years already, and they’ve universally panned out to be crap. From the Ouya to the Nvidia Shield line, and even the non-Android-powered AppleTV, none of these platforms have done anything to move gaming forward. The Ouya held promise as a way for Indie games to shine in the public eye, but ultimately Steam and the Nintendo Switch have been far more important in that regard. The Nvidia Shield line, which started with a handheld, evolved to a convertible tablet (which pre-empted the Switch’s main novelty by a couple years), then ditched all of the handheld options for a set-top box that aims to rope users into a perpetual subscription to stream PC games from one screen to another. And the AppleTV is primarily a media consumption box, with gaming bolted-on after the fact, as a way to give Apple fanboys more places to interact with their perpetual Apple Arcade subscription.
Interestingly, out of all the failed-and-failing …
E3 2020 Canceled… Will it Ever Return?
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 03/15/20 at 04:03 PM CT
Like so many other large-scale social events, the Electronic Entertainment Expo – colloquially known as E3 – has been canceled in 2020 due to concerns over the spread of the COVID-19 coronavirus. E3 was considered a staple of the Games Industry for many years since its inaugural event in 1995, but more recently, with the Internet sinking its talons onto more and more facets of business and everyday life, E3 has been on the decline.
In 2013, Nintendo officially bowed-out of E3, starting their tradition of ‘Nintendo Direct’ videos in lieu of hosting a large-scape press conference each year. This made sense in the aftermath of the disastrous WiiU reveal, and as a gaming company struggling with irrelevance in the greater Games Industry, with only its legions of dedicated fanboys to prop it up. But even with its current highly-popular Switch platform, Nintendo has shown no interest in returning to E3 with anything more than a handful of demo booths.
Sony, ever the follower …
He’s Everywhere IV!: Final Fantasy Edition
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 03/08/20 at 03:10 PM CT
The first time I roasted Chris for his early-March birthday, I tried to prune-down the large number of Chris-like people and creatures that inhabit the entirety of videogames to a meager 10. In the next roast, I stuck with the cockfighting pets from Nintendo’s ‘Pokemon’ franchise. The year after that, I went with Akira Toriyama-designed creatures from the venerable ‘Dragon Quest’ series. The other side of the ‘Dragon Quest’ coin, though, is the equally-venerable ‘Final Fantasy’ series, which has been under the same banner as ‘Dragon Quest’ since Squaresoft and Enix merged in 2003, and is the topic of this year’s roast.
Like ‘Dragon Quest,’ much of ‘Final Fantasy’s’ consistent visual style (what little there actually is) comes from the design work of artist, Yoshitaka Amano, who designed most of the iconic enemies the series is known for, having done nearly all of the visual design work for the first 6 games (i.e., before the series went to pot). …
Review Round-Up: Winter 2019
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 03/01/20 at 02:30 PM CT
Welcome back to another installment of the MeltedJoystick Review Round-Up. Here’s what our staff has reviewed since last time:
Nelson’s Reviews:
I spent most of the quarter playing relatively new additions to my backlog. Some of these experiences incited me to go back and (re)play the titles that inspired them, so I managed to squeeze in a few Retroarch romps (more like slogs) as well. Ultimately, it was still a mostly disappointing quarter, with only the untarnished glory of “Valkyria Chronicles 4” keeping my hopes afloat as 2020 begins.
“Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire” – 4/5
“Super Mario Maker 2” – 3/5
“Super Mario Land 2: 6 Golden Coins” – 2/5
“The Messenger” – 3.5/5
“Super Mario Land” – 2.5/5
“Ninja Gaiden (1989)” – 1/5
“Valkyria Chronicles 4” – 5/5
“Asterix & Obelix XXL2: Roman Rumble in Las Vegum” – 3/5
“Even the Ocean” – 3.5/5
“The Fall of Gods” – 3.5/5
Chris’ Reviews:
It was a really …
Backlog: The Embiggening – March, 2020
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 02/23/20 at 03:15 PM CT
Welcome back to another look into the near future. With the onset of March, we bid farewell to the misery of Winter and begin to look forward to the rebirth ceremonies associated with Springtime and the Spring Equinox, representing the long-fought victory of warmth, light, and life over cold, darkness and death. March is also the month that traditionally “comes in like a lion and out like a lamb”… but it looks like both of those animals had chronic diarrhea, based on the games being released this month.
As per the usual, we’ve got three piles based on kids’ TV coming in March, two based on anime and one based on something far worse. The anime games are based on the grammatically-torturous “My Hero Ones Justice” and the questionably-drawn “One Piece,” while the non-anime game is based on something called “Gigantosaurus,” but conveniently includes “The Game” in the title, calling itself out as shovelware for those who might just think “Gigantosaurus” …
Can’t Stoppy That Copy
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 02/16/20 at 03:20 PM CT
The other day while doing some late-night reading, I noticed a large scratch across my wrist and immediately thought, “Yikes! It looks like I tried to kill myself!” I don’t know why I thought that, considering the scratch most likely came from hauling a load of firewood without gloves, but the seed of that thought has stuck with me. Why do we, in the 21st Century, immediately think of suicide when we think of scratches or cuts on the wrist? By all accounts of medical professionals, it’s a highly inefficient and dubiously effective way of offing oneself, yet the idea sits in our collective psyche like a leaden weight.
While the idea of suicide itself is as ancient as the human species, the slitting of the wrists is not a concept of ancient origin, as our ancestors were typically much more efficient and dedicated, either in drinking poison (usually at the behest of the local government) or jamming a sword into the neck or abdomen, guaranteeing that they wouldn’t “get …
Console Gaming Deathwatch Enters Phase Three
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 02/09/20 at 03:27 PM CT
The long, slow death of console gaming is continuing at its leisurely pace. The first phase was the “singularity,” in which all consoles and PC became largely undifferentiated due to the rampant multi-platforming of third-party game releases. The second phase was when consoles themselves ceased to be profitable and network infrastructure began to be the primary source of revenue for platform holders.
Recently, Sony announced that it would be following Microsoft’s example from 2016, and start releasing its first-party exclusive titles on PC in addition to PlayStation. Thus comes the third phase, the shedding of first-party exclusives and the loss of the last traditional differentiating feature of the various gaming platforms.
Back in 2018, Sony renewed its focus on first-party titles, with a corporate restructuring that placed a greater emphasis than ever on the concept of “making PlayStation the best place to play” by having stuff that gamers couldn’t get elsewhere. …
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