Rating of
1.5/5
I Don't Want Her, You Can Have Her
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 06/20/14
"Fat Princess" is essentially a Massively Multiplayer Online Real-Time Strategy game. It requires 32 players per team, and each team battles to kidnap the other side's princess, whom the other side stuffs with cake to make her fatter and thus heavier and more difficult to kidnap.
Even the single-player and local multiplayer modes rely on this same basic mechanic, and the overreliance on this mechanic is what leads "Fat Princess" to its downfall. Unlike a traditional RTS (or even a bizarre thing that only vaguely resembles an RTS, like "Pikmin" or "Little King's Story"), each individual unit must be controlled by a different person. In the event of a 1-4 player local, offline game, the other 28-31 characters running around the battlefield will be controlled by AI... a MORONIC and INCOMPETENT AI that doesn't understand teamwork or strategy of any kind.
Thus "Fat Princess" is rendered unplayable simply due to its reliance on online cooperation and refusal to let a single player handle too much on their own. While I often lament the RTS genre for requiring too much micromanagement and forcing players to fracture their attention on too many different things, "Fat Princess" swings the pendulum too far in the other direction.
She's too fat for me!
