Trump Unknowingly Touts Videogame Mechanic as COVID-19 Cure
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 04/26/20 at 03:10 PM CT
The wholly-unqualified, perpetually-bankrupt (both financially and ethically), conspiracy-mongering, insult-flinging President of the United States (and sometimes Troll Doll), Donald J. Trump doesn’t like videogames. And he will gladly throw the medium under the bus whenever he can use such action to gain brownie points with the religious fundamentalist nut-jobs in his voting base (such as when a mass shooting can be attributed to the shooter’s love of gaming instead of Jesus). However, this past week, President Clown inadvertently came up with a solution to the COVID-19 pandemic, which has been sweeping the world and crashing economies for months now, that comes straight from the unspeakable world of gaming.
Speaking at a Federal Coronavirus briefing, Trump – whose vocabulary is largely limited to the words “tremendous,” “beautiful,” “powerful,” and a small handful of other similar adjectives – was impressed by the ability of both disinfectants and UV light to …
“The Woke of Us”: Sony Sequel to be Less Game, More Propaganda
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 04/19/20 at 05:43 PM CT
Earlier this April, a leaked plot synopsis for “The Last of Us: Part 2” made the rounds in the dark underbelly of the Internet gaming community, before being removed by a DMCA takedown notice. In this synopsis, it was revealed that, far from being a post-apocalyptic zombie story that just happens to contain lesbians, the long-awaited cinematic sequel will, in reality, be a LGBTQ+ gender dysphoriac story that just happens to take place after a zombie apocalypse.
Series writer, Neil Druckmann, is a self-professed male feminist and follower of Anita Sarkeesian, who, emboldened by both the positive reactions toward and negative backlash against his “The Last of Us” DLC and graphic novel, which revealed main character Ellie’s lesbian leanings, has decided to cram as much divisive identity politics into the sequel as possible. While leaks and rumors are inherently disreputable, veteran voice actor, Troy Baker, who portrays former-lead-character, Joel, in ‘The Last of Us’ …
Atari Hits New Low with Cryptocurrency and Online Gambling
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 04/12/20 at 03:03 PM CT
I don’t think it’s necessary to retread the well-trampled ground of Atari’s (delenda est) past crimes, since I covered that dark chapter in videogame history quite well enough back in 2012. Yet, just when it seemed that the worst platform-holder in all of gaming history was ready to turn over a new leaf with their rebooted Atari VCS ‘open’ tinker-friendly console (which still hasn’t shipped nearly a year after going up for pre-order), two new Atari (delenda est) projects have come to light for 2020, and they are wholly indicative that the vile subsidiary still hasn’t learned its lesson.
First off, Atari (delenda est) has created a new cryptocurrency to compete with Bitcoin and its myriad ilk, which seems to be tied intimately into the Atari VCS’s online ecosystem. These so-called “Atari Tokens” are meant to be a new take on the old token-based economies of “totally legitimate businesses” like carnivals, county fairs, and traditional arcades where players of …
‘Animal Crossing’ is Not a Tentpole Franchise
Nelson Schneider - wrote on 04/05/20 at 05:02 PM CT
Those depraved Nintendo fanboys are at it again! With the dismal release schedules happening in the world of videogames for the past two months, combined with the delays and postponements triggered by the coronavirus plague, hype-driven, FOMO-inspired gamers are desperate for some new thing to obsess over. And as Nintendo platforms are prone to what their own fan communities euphemistically refer to as “droughts,” anyone who only owns a Switch at this point is being forced to look closely at the platform’s giant pile of ports – and old news doesn’t inspire FOMO – or desperately cling to the single new first-party release and inflate its importance beyond sanity. Most of them chose the latter. And what is that release? “Animal Crossing: New Horizons.”
First, let’s start with a short history lesson about ‘Animal Crossing.’ The series was a new first-party Nintendo IP that initially launched on the Gamecube, alongside the likes of ‘Pikmin.’ However, before …
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